Fiction Friday – Periapt, Vilipend and Embrangle

During my previous foray into Friction Friday, I discovered that I am less of a ‘first draft’ writer and more of an outline with dialogue kinda girl.  I will begin to work on that next week.  This week the task was to use the words villipend, periapt and embrangle in a story.  Let us see, boys and girls, if I was successful.

‘That’s a wrap fellas’ the invisible voice shouted.
‘Whew! I am ready to go home, have three or four fingers of bourbon, no make that six or seven and settle down with the racing forms.  There’s a little filly out there wanting to make me a bundle’ Pop said.
The three actors headed for their dressing rooms.  In the hallway they spotted a sharp dressed trio of undertakers.  Upon closer inspection, they recognized the men.
‘ah it’s you Vilipend?  What are you doing here?’
‘Boys, boys, it’s good to see you.  You haven’t been in contact for a while.  We just came by to check you were alright, no broken legs or anything.  Let’s go into you dressing room where we can talk.  Periapt,  wait out here, see we aren’t disturbed.’
Resigned, Pop shrugged and allowed the others to enter his dressing room.  Vilipend wasted no time.  ‘You have been on this job for six months.  We need to close this up and move on to the next  one.  If you can’t do it, let me know.  I will give it to someone else.  Someone younger.’
‘No need to talk like that.  There is no one better to torch a building than Crackle there, and Snap can break a man in two without breathing hard, and if you need someone offed, I am your man.’ Pop said ‘but this job has been a little more tricky than we anticipated.’
‘Tricky?  Tricky how?’
‘Well…. It’s like this.’ Crackle said. ‘Profits weren’t so good, last quarter and the company couldn’t pay us, so, well, um they..  Here just look.’  Crackle handed a box to Vilipend.
‘What the fuck is wrong with you!’  he shouted ‘we work for the General Mills mafia and you have become the mascots of feckin’ Rice Krispies cereal?  What a bunch of shitehawks!  Embrangle, tell Periapt to come here, we require his expertise.
The undertakes exited the room as the final body hit the floor.
‘Boss do you think we could become cereal mascots?’ asked Embrangle
‘I wouldn’t eat any cereal that had Vilipend, Periapt and Embrangle on the box.  Who knows what the fuck would be inside.’

Fiction Friday – Kill Al

‘No officer, if i’da killed Al, would I be sitting here in this bar having a martini?’

Well truth be told, that’s exactly what I was doing.  Some people just need killin’ and Al was one of them.

Two hours earlier

‘Damnit Earl it’s about time you got here.  Something is wrong with the camera on the left corner of the house.  It has been down two hours.  You know that means God only knows what is going on in that house!’

‘Calm down Al, i’ll have a look see and fix it right up for you.  You know,  if it wasn’t  for you we wouldn’t have any idea about all the shit going on round here.’

‘well no good comes from people when they aren’t held accountable to the rules.’

I let out a gruff sigh.  ‘Stay here, give me a shout if you get see anything on the screen, ok?’

‘right’

It took me only a minute to diagnosis the problem.  A squirrel.   He had chewed though the video cable.   In ten minutes I had replaced the cable. I couldn’t resist the urge to stick  my tongue out at the camera.
‘Knock that off’  Al yelled to me.

‘Look alright?’ I asked as I walked back into the room.

‘yeah mate, thanks.  Now I can keep an eye on number 37.’

‘That’s your problem Al, your so damn nosy’.  I shoved the knife between his shoulder blades.

He whirled to face me. ‘ What.’

I took a step back, he came at me.    ‘If this was tv, you would be dead’ I spluttered.

‘well mate this ain’t tv’  he reached for the telephone.

In a panic I grabbed the desk lamp and swung with all my might.  I only landed a glancing blow.  ‘Damn’ I swung again and again and again.

Al fell to the floor, the blood pouring from his head.  I gave him one more bash on his forehead for safety’s sake.

I answered the buzz of my mobile. ‘Hello Janet.  Go ahead and call the realtor tomorrow,  this is a great neighborhood to live in now.’

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