‘No officer, if i’da killed Al, would I be sitting here in this bar having a martini?’
Well truth be told, that’s exactly what I was doing. Some people just need killin’ and Al was one of them.
Two hours earlier
‘Damnit Earl it’s about time you got here. Something is wrong with the camera on the left corner of the house. It has been down two hours. You know that means God only knows what is going on in that house!’
‘Calm down Al, i’ll have a look see and fix it right up for you. You know, if it wasn’t for you we wouldn’t have any idea about all the shit going on round here.’
‘well no good comes from people when they aren’t held accountable to the rules.’
I let out a gruff sigh. ‘Stay here, give me a shout if you get see anything on the screen, ok?’
It took me only a minute to diagnosis the problem. A squirrel. He had chewed though the video cable. In ten minutes I had replaced the cable. I couldn’t resist the urge to stick my tongue out at the camera.
‘Knock that off’ Al yelled to me.
‘Look alright?’ I asked as I walked back into the room.
‘yeah mate, thanks. Now I can keep an eye on number 37.’
‘That’s your problem Al, your so damn nosy’. I shoved the knife between his shoulder blades.
He whirled to face me. ‘ What.’
I took a step back, he came at me. ‘If this was tv, you would be dead’ I spluttered.
‘well mate this ain’t tv’ he reached for the telephone.
In a panic I grabbed the desk lamp and swung with all my might. I only landed a glancing blow. ‘Damn’ I swung again and again and again.
Al fell to the floor, the blood pouring from his head. I gave him one more bash on his forehead for safety’s sake.
I answered the buzz of my mobile. ‘Hello Janet. Go ahead and call the realtor tomorrow, this is a great neighborhood to live in now.’